Friday, June 20, 2008

What's on my mind?... Too much!

After days of contemplation regarding what I should write in my latest post, I couldn't narrow it down... so get ready for some subject jumps!
First - I'm tired of all of the judgement around me. Not necessarily directed toward me, but around me. Judging people's lifestyles or parenting; judging people's houses or cars; judging choices... I'm definitely guilty of it myself. I judge behavior but then I try to step back and think about how I can't stand to explain choices that I'm making. Honestly - I really do put myself in their shoes. One of my least favorite things in the world is explaining myself or answering questions about what I'm doing - why I'm doing it - who I'm doing it with... very frustrating in my book. Life is so short and I truly believe live and let live. My weakness in judging is when I feel like I need to protect my son from behavior or actions. We all hear, 'boys will be boys,' but there is a level of inappropriateness that I won't ignore.
Secondly - I've recently had a big life lesson in trust and integrity. I won't go into detail about it because those who betrayed my business trust don't deserve the acknowledgement in my writing. I will say it was like the wind had been knocked out of me when the breech of trust was confirmed. I literally had difficulty concentrating on anything that day and puzzle pieces started to fall into place regarding sequence of events. The only thing I can say is that integrity is a trait that I hold very near to my heart - hopefully those who have been colleagues or friends over the years know that my word is money in the bank. I come from a long line of paranoid folks...earning our trust is tough, keeping our trust is tougher, regaining our trust after it's been breeched is nearly impossible.
Thirdly (and lastly) - there has been a lot going on in my world lately and I've been a little at the end of my rope. I'm not saying that others don't have more or less going on - but in my reality - it has been a little rough. (side note - that's where some judgment comes in as well - what people have the right to be overwhelmed by - that's a blog for another day) I try to focus on what's really important to me and what's worth stressing over. Chip reminded me last night why I finally left my job to stay home (and write), that I was tired of being stressed to the limit over things that weren't important in the grand scheme of life. What is important right now is my son swimming for our swim team for the 2nd season and he's really doing great. He placed for the first time in a meet and earned points for the team - he got 4th place out of 23 swimmers in freestyle - he was super proud... obviously so am I! Go Marlins!!

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